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How to Become a Billionaire

Written By Brian Hicks

Posted January 17, 2008




Hat tip here to The Big Picture.

This was one was simply too funny/true to ignore.

It came from a site called Long or Short Capital. It’s by some guy named Johnny Debacle–lol– and is entitled: Five Simple Steps to Becoming a Billionaire: The Greenspan Method.

  1. Become Fed Chairman
  2. Lower interest rates until you create an asset bubble. Hold them low until stagflation is in the air and a real estate bubble is floating
  3. Stop being Fed Chairman and release a book on how you didn’t do anything wrong and have no regrets. If possible, time it perfectly with the worst real estate market in generations
  4. Join the hedge fund which has profited more in % and dollar terms than anyone else has from your mess (which you didn’t create)
  5. Build a platinum statue of your muse, Ayn Rand, and sleep with it every night

It also helps if you are mostly unethical.

Addendum: Look at this quote from Greenspan from the WSJ’s Real Time Economics:

“Q: All three of your clients – Pimco, Deutsche Bank and now Paulson – were bearish early on housing and mortgages. Is there a connection?

A: I hadn’t [noticed] until you just raised the issue.”


Maestro my you-know-what. He hadn’t noticed?!?!?! You can’t make this stuff up even if you tried.

Here, by the way, is what the former Fed Chairman, Paul Volcker, had to say about the mess that Ben Bernanke inherited.

He nailed it when he told Roger Lowenstein of the The New York Times the following:

“I think Bernanke is in a very difficult situation. Too many bubbles have been going on for too long.”

“The Fed is not really in control of the situation.”

Smart guy Volcker.